I have always struggled with who I am and who I thought that I should be. I thought that I should be a tall, thin blonde with perfect breasts, and a flat stomach, and straight teeth. I should have flawless skin and be able to easily hold the attention of anyone that I meet. I should wear conservative clothes, in only the best pastels. I should never cause a scene.
That isn't who I am. I have tried. That is not who I am.
I'm not tall. I am not blonde. I do not have perfect skin, or hair, or teeth. I struggle with the idea of my weight, and I constantly feel inadequate.
And then I started getting tattoos. I've always been fond of them. To have a part of your personality be shown for the world to see, is so majestic. It is so freeing.
Then I encountered people who dislike them and made me feel ugly for the art that is so close to my heart. I second guessed everything about myself, and thought of ways to conceal them. This didn't heal the unrest in my spirit. I had to look deep within myself and strip away all of my concerns for the people around me. At my very core, I enjoy tattoos. I enjoy wearing the little pieces of my heart for the world to see. I enjoy looking in the mirror and seeing the choices that I made for myself.
I enjoy knowing that I am who I was meant to be. I spent so many years of my life trying to be like the other girls that I grew up around. The stereotypical Christian girls. I am not a stereotype. I am not a thing for you to pick a part. The art that I display is only one part of who I am.
It just happens to be my favorite part of me. I didn't choose my hair, or my eyes. I didn't choose my height, or the size of my hands. I chose my tattoos, and my independence.
Here's to truly growing,
:)
